diseney land trip thoughts

So I have been thinking about it, and I think that I am ready to write my thoughts on disneyland. This year.... I had a really good time. on top of that, there was no real drama. seems really odd for me to say that, because it seemed like the two always went hand in hand.

This year I also had to make some really tough decisions, decisions that in a earlier time I would have just avoided. This last week I went through alot of, stuff. there is no real blame for anyone or any one thing as to why, but by the end of the week I felt like I had gotten crontrol of it and I was ready to go to disneyland and have a good time. This is a really important time for me, and somthing that I have decided is important to me, and that I need to do for me.

It makes me sad that I feel like I had to hurt someone I care about it to achieve my goals, but I truly believe that with everything else going on, the way things worked out was better for everyone involved, and yes I know that seems like i am making decisions for other people, but really this decision was for me, and my happieness. I feel like I don't give enough credit to that most times.

I met some new people this weekend, I got to catch up with people I don't get to talk to much that have had such a huge impact on my life, I got to smile and laugh, and just be happy. close to "the old dave" the one I miss so much. The weather was wonderful, it felt good to just be ok with everything again. its been so long.

laying here in bed, I can say. this weekend has been really nice, and coming home with an extra day off was very much worth it. I feel like I have made sugnificant progress on me, and now I can make a plan for my future, starting with smaller goals again, getting back into the swing of how the whole process works. I feel like I again have hope for the future, no matter what it might hold for me. I am starting to feel that sence of energy, of hope, of happieness just because coming back to me.

I have had been blessed to have so much love in my life, i need to remember that, I need to remember all the positives in my life all the good things. there are so many people in my life that care about me, people that mean so much to me... I just need to make sure I don't forget that, espically in the dark times.

saturday's activities

OK.. Well.. its been a long day, its almost 2am sunday morning, I have to be up by like 8 so go to the show, and I am just now in the hotel room for the night...

Other than some random drama which has no bearing on this entrie, its been a pretty good day. I made it down to see my friend K she was not quite ready to go, so I just vegged for a little while. once she was ready, we went over and had what I think is the best chicken ravoli I have ever had, at a resturant near her house. I mean it was OUT OF THIS WORLD.

After the heavenly food, we headed down to newport so that I could pick up some sprinkles (cupcakes mentioned before) when we got there, K asked me if I wanted to go to the "doggie bakery" when she said that, I said yes just so I could see this place.. LOL once inside I couldn't resiste getting gizmo some a couple treats. I am betting he will like them. While we were there, I got a message from Mark a friend of mine who said that it would be cool if I would stop by and see him. He also mentioned that my other friend Paul was in from San Fran, that he was also there.

Mark works for disney, and since I had a pass I thought "why not" once I was there and parked, and in the park. I got a message saying that he was working in the hotel (this is not where he normally works lol) so I had to truck almost all the way back to the car to get to the hotel. we said hi, exchanged a few words. I mentioned my phone was WAY dead and I needed to go get a charger for it. He said he was off work at 6 and that I should come back and we could find paul and watch the fireworks. This sounded like a cool Idea to me so I left to go find a charger.

Once I found a charger I had about an hour to kill so I drove around wiht my phone plugged into the car, and I went to where I used to work. (about 30-40 minutes form disney) I sat in the parking lot there, and thought about how things used to be. How they were when I worked there. How young I was, how much different I thought about thing. I got pretty emotional, think about everything that had happened since then. I decided to drive back to Disney, on my way I was still really emotional.. I sent a text message that I realize now that I should not have. LIve and learn I guess.

I got back to the park, got the car parked and started walking toward the park. Mark said that he would be a little late, so I figured I would wander around the park for a while. after about 20 minutes or so, I looked at my phone and it became clear that it did not take much of a charge while in the car. I tried resetting it as I had in the past with no luck, after about an hour or so in the park, people watching for the most part, I got a message from Mark saying that we should meet at the little bar they have at the hotel.

I got to the bar, there were no tables So I wandered around a little my phone beeped, and died. (again) I watched the remotecontrol boats, and the smiles on the kids faces that were getting such pleasure from raming them into one another. As I wandered around, I saw someone what I SWORE was my friend paul. As I got closer, it was clear that it WAS him... he was looking at a menu, i looked over his sholder and asked if he found anything good? he turned around initally with a look that said somthing to the effect of "who the hell said that" then he saw it was me, and his expression turned into "OMG" wollowed by HOW the heck are ya.

we caught up a little, each ordered a drink, a table opened up and we sat down to talk and wait for mark. another hour or so passed, I don't know what time it was since my phone was dead, I do know it was dark out by this time thought.

We went into the park, watched the fireworks, and then fantasmic. By this time it was pretty late, and I was starving. I mentioned food, it was agreed that we should eat. jack in the box here we come.. LOL.. after eating I parted company, plugged in my phone, turned it on, and here I am, falling asleep at the keyboard back at my hotel at 2am. When I did get back here, I noticed that all the parking spots were filled with really nice VW's that made me happy to see.

SOOO tired its time for me to sleep.