there are no words

there are no words that truly express how I am feeling, so lost, so much like a failure, ready for things to turn around. I want to be happy again, I want to stop hurting. its been a very very long day and I am ready for it to be over...

No More Sad Songs

Random song that made me cry.

This is the way, That i state my independence, That i'm no longer connected to your memory. This is the day that i'm making my defection, that I claim back the affection that you stole from me. I used to hear your music so loud But its so low.
You're just another face in the crowd, I'm letting you know.

[Chorus:]
No more sad songs, I'm letting you go now, Switched off switched on, I'm letting you know, you turned out the light. I'm
gonna be alright when I... turn the radio off. No more sad songs.

These are the words to descibe all your offences. You said love in the past tense and then you let it go. Haven't you heard, Your are no longer respected, you are formally rejected from the one you hurt. I used to have the longing to hear
what was in your heart, But now it seems i'm over the fear of this falling apart.

[Chorus]

No more sad songs. I used to have the longing to hear what was in your heart, but now it seems i'm over the fear of this
falling apart.

No more sad songs, I'm letting it go now, Switched off switched on, I'm letting you know. No more sad songs, I'm letting it
go now, Switched off switched on, I'm letting you know. you turned out the light. I'm gonna be alright without... Turn your
radio off. No more sad songs. No more sad songs.
No more sad song, No more sad songs.

song during my workout.

Well I was movin at the speed of sound
Head spinnin couldn't find my way around, and
Didn't know that I was goin' down Yeahh, Yeahh
Where I been, well its all a blurr
What I was lookin' for, I'm not sure
Too late and didn't see it coming Yeahh,
Yeahh

Then I crashed into you
and I went up in flames
Could've been the death of me
But then you breathed your breath in me
Then I crashed into you
like a runaway train
You will consume me
But, I can't walk away

Some how I couldn't stop myself
Just wanted to know how it felt
Too strong I couldn't hold on Yeahh, Yeahh
Now I'm just tryin to make some sense
Out of how and why this happened
Where were headed, there's just no knowin Yeahh, Yeahh

And then I crashed into you
and I went up in flames
Could've been the death of me
But then you breathed your breath in me
Then I crashed into you
like a runaway train
You will consume me
But, I can't walk away

From your face, your eyes
are burning into me
You saved me, you gave me
Just what I need
ohh, just what I need

And then I crashed into you
and I went up in flames
Could've been the death of me
But then you breathed your breath in me
Then I crashed into you
like a runaway train
You will consume me
But, I can't walk away

Then I crashed into you (x5)
Like a runaway train
You will consume me
But I can't walk away






I cried, composed myself and went out and worked out till I was totally broke down, mentally and phisically. I feel better now

Nothing Left I can say.

So I haven't posted here for a while. I really lost the interest to write, with everything else going on in my life. About a week ago, my life took a drastic turn, a turn I did not see coming and had no idea how to deal with. It occurred to me, recently that letting go is one of the hardest things for me. Even after making so many mistakes, and hurting someone, its still hard for me to let go, beyond the pain, and the should have, and the could have. I want so desperately to be able to help everyone in my life and make their lives better somehow.

What I am learning is there are times when I have to let go, when I either have done as much as I can, or by my actions alone I hurt someone else. This is somthing that I cannot live with. Espically when its someone I considered my best friend. It is to late now, to late to apologize there is nothing more I can do.

Yes this post is written for you. I never wanted to hurt you. I never wanted to drive you away. its to late for excuses, its to late to mend the fences. This is something I will have to live with the rest of my life.